Reminisce

The dark, dreary, cold days are usually the loneliest. They're just those days you don't want to speak to anyone or see anyone. All you want is to lay in your bed and be quiet. After the silence, listen to some sad music as you watch the minutes turn to hours. It's on these gloomy days we must learn to be thankful.

Being gloomy is easy, anything in the negative is easy to come by, it takes no effort. Positivity on the other hand requires effort and attitude. Gloomy days can be turned to days of gratitude if you decide. Feelings are deceptive, they change so quickly with that being said, we need to learn to adjust them accordingly. When you wake up feeling gloomy, start to change your mood by thinking about all the wonderful things that have happened in your life.

I spent my day with a friend yesterday, we basically reminisced on the wonderful moments we've had in our lives. I for one have met wonderful people that have each played an important role in my life and am truly grateful for them. Now, these people may have ended up hurting me in the end but I choose to focus on the positive ways they impacted my life. The people in your life that have come by and left have impacted you in some way. You have made wonderful memories, shared unforgettable moments, moments that you only dreamt of and yet, that person made it a reality. Yes, now, you may not be in the best of places together, and that's fine because some people come in our lives for a season and that's okay.

Instead of being gloomy all day, cheer up and be grateful for the people that came and left in your life, the people that are still in your life, the blessings you currently have and the ones you're yet to have, most importantly, thank God for our life. Develop an attitude of gratitude and transform your life.

This too shall pass

There comes a time when life hits hard, when the blows are painful and it seems giving up is the best option. When you look around and realize you're the only one in your army, when people are so far out of reach. When the pain of your mistakes stains your hands and the evidence is written all of your face and you can't escape. Other times, things just happen that you don't understand how and why they've happened the way they have and it hurts. It hurts like hell, it hurts, the pain is unbearable and your heart feels sore.

Recently, I lost an aunt and an uncle all under a week. In the same week, i was sick for days and the weight of it all was unbearable and heavy. The pain of my heart led to anger and all I wanted to do was scream and yell at the world. I was unable to attend the burial of my uncle or my aunt because of being sick. I'd wake up screaming most nights, I'm either being choked or being inflicted with pain in my dreams or half awake state. I'd look to the heavens seeking comfort from God and he seemed quiet most times. Giving up on him and life is way easier than it is to fight...so it seemed.

The greatest battle we can ever fight is  staying alive when things have gotten too tough to face. I don't know how many times suicide has knocked on my door and I have had to hold onto God's hand even tighter. When my feet could not carry the weight of my heart, when death seemed easier. Each time, a little voice would tell me something different to remind me that life is worth living even when it's dark. The purpose of life is not to live it blissfully and escape the pain. The purpose of life is to live it with the pain and show the scars that we have felt pain and made it through and we're alive.
I don't know what kind of pain you're experiencing right now, I don't know who you've lost, I may not understand what your tomorrow brings but I know that you're not alone. God is always with you and me, he is always with us. He is always on our side. You may feel you are not strong enough to bare the pain, the burden maybe too heavy and that's okay. Leave it at the feet of Jesus and ask for renewed strength to keep going. The point of hitting rock bottom is the only way left is up. Have faith in God, Isaiah tells us that even the youth grow weary, psalms 23 says "even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me." Romans 15:4 "For everything that was written in the past was written to teach us, so that through the endurance taught in the Scriptures and the encouragement they provide we might have hope." God never stops caring for us 1 Peter 5:7 " Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you."

Always remember "this too shall pass."